Moving

This will either be the best or worst decision of my life. And I can't wait to find out


- love Whitney

I miss my friendship with will.

I needed a mental decluttering. But I still feel cluttered


- love Whitney

The longer I wait to move, the more lazy complacent depressed anxious and derailed I get

- love Whitney

I'm so scared about moving. And that's why I'm pushing to move so soon- I just want to get it over with and jump in head first. The longer I wait I start to reflect on my choices and doubt I'm making the right decision to move.

I'm scared of:
Not getting a job
Spending all my savings
Being broke and having to move home
Leaving my parents
Being a failure
Leaving possible opportunities in southern california


- love Whitney

Dad is in the hospital again


- love Whitney

Moving forward

So I'm done. Being ignored is over. Efforts to manipulate or make me feel small are done. Hypocrisy is irritating

I've deleted them all out of my phone book. I threw the numbers away and didn't look back.

I'm mad
I worked for months trying to conduct a friendship by a certain set of rules that apparently apply only to me. I'm not upset about the change in status, upset that I feel used and that it was expected I wouldn't have feelings about it. I wouldn't be affected? Times that were deamed "busy", were they really?
I didnt get the decency or respect to Talk about our communication on this or reveal that some how the rules were called off. No, I've been living a tip toed life and news was nonchalantly dropped in a conversation. My feelings matter that little? You didn't think I'd care? Fine. Now I know what ur really busy with all the time.

I wrote this to vent. And to release it. I'm done

Time to move away and start over
I always dreamt of disappearing one day, deleting my phone and not telling anyone when I left. Then to live as just a memory. A fleeting thought now and again. Somehow that sounds blissful. I dunno if I'll do it, but that dream is there



- love Whitney

Everyone keeps telling me how miserable I seem. I dont know whats going on or what's wrong. Is it me? Is it my situation? I've been feeling like this so long I dont remember my old self anymore. I'm stuck, suspended in jello with toothpicks being jabbed at me. I can't talk to anyone without getting in a fight. Especially my parents. I wanna be more than this but I don't know how

And lastly a picfrom my vacation


- love Whitney